GO FUND ME
It has become increasingly expensive to just live, not just for me, but everyone. But this attempt to raise funds for my trust account is to tell you that the water heater @ $569 and the installation that went from yesterday’s price of $503 to over $1700 today for the Mesquite city code puts my very life in jeopardy.
I have lived for years now, knowing that this roof on my house is “toast” as the guys said when they patched the leak said. I have lived here hoping that a hail storm does not destroy the roof, and by the grace of God, it hasn’t had a hail storm. And it hasn’t leaked since the $600 patch a couple of years ago. The cost for a new roof is about $8000.
My life has been simple—well complex too—over the past 15 years. I have struggled to take care of my mom through many health issues, have lovingly cared for her, stayed with her, cooked for her, taken her to surgeries and appointments ad infinitum. Most of my friends have seen me do it.
I have struggled with devastating depression and I tried to end it all over 15 years ago when I still lived in Ft. Worth. I was tired of fighting THEN. I took an entire month’s supply of antidepressants, a bunch of anxiety meds all with copious amounts of rum and diet coke. No one knew I did this. I was passed out for some days by myself. I gradually came to, realizing the attempt failed. I have lived for most of these past 15 years with absolutely no desire to live but I promised Susan and my mother I would not attempt suicide again.
The attempt to kill myself was no cry for help. It wasn’t a casual thing because I was discouraged about one thing. It was a permanent solution to all the suffering I was going through and had for years, not the least of which was years of disabling depression.
I sold as many possessions as I could and sold the Ft. Worth house. I started going to church at Calvary Hill in Mesquite where my former youth director from Kaufman was assistant pastor. My good friend, Pam Wimpee Sandlin was on staff there. I did not know what else to do. I started driving from Ft. Worth to the offices of Dallas psychiatrist Joel Holiner for medication and counseling. They put me on a very harsh medication for drug resistant depression and I don’t recall how long I was on it. I stayed with my sister for some weeks while I searched for a house somewhere on the east side of Dallas. It was very discouraging. I even looked at a burned house. I had to pay cash for the house because of ruined credit and it really was not enough to buy a house.
I looked all over east Dallas, Garland and Mesquite, but nothing was affordable for me. One morning though my sister got up and said, we are going to find you a house! So we got online and pulled up a list from realtor.com and struck out.
The very last house on our list said it was 3BR 1 BA and that it was 887 square feet which sounded impossible. Not only that, I just plain did not want to go look at it. Susan still encouraged me that we’d go look, especially because it was priced so that I could afford it.
A realtor was not with us so we weren’t able to see inside, or so we thought. I opened the glass door and checked the door. Indeed it was locked, but I pushed on the door slightly and it opened! Magic! We went in and to my amazement it was the best of all we had seen in two weeks time. The price had just been lowered and all I had was cash. So the process began to put an offer on it.
My sister Susan took an extra step and decided to write a letter to the listing realtor on my behalf pleading that I needed to buy THIS house. The listing realtor acknowledged the letter and we wrote up the sale. Papers were signed and soon I went to my storage unit in Ft. Worth to start bringing things to the house.
I have juggled the care of this home, taking care of my mother as long as she lived in Kaufman and what work I could get, along with all my own health issues. I was awarded disability seven years ago upon the first application based on three criteria—debilitating depression, diabetes, and advanced coronary artery disease, plus one massive heart attack.
One of the saddest things for me personally was living in a house that had beat up doors and woodwork and unimproved kitchen and bath plus needing repairs to the exterior. God provided a miracle for me to receive funds from my mother as she went in the nursing home via a trust for the disabled and I was able to redo this tiny house properly. I did as much as I could myself but had the rest done. A second miracle was my shiny red pickup. While my mom was still in her apartment I took her to a doctor’s appointment in my old pickup and when we got home, she said find yourself another vehicle and I will get it for you. I went online for weeks and weeks looking at what was available in DFW and narrowed it down to some sort of pickup in the $7000.00 price range. I never went to test drive any. I never felt the urge for anything except to keep driving the 97 Chevy S10. A few months went by.
I had taken in a cousin, Matt Land, when he was in a crisis, and one Sunday I almost did not go to church, but then decided, no, I shall go. I pulled into the lot and went to my usual space to park and right next to it was a shiny red GMC Sierra with a for sale sign in the window. I got out and dialed the number and the church member came out and we talked. He said he was asking seven thousand but if I would buy it before Wednesday he would take $6500.00. The member had improved the 2002 pickup with new carpet, put red leather seats in it, and put a new headliner. It had 102,000 miles on it. Barely broken in.
Have you ever experienced such a personal miracle? I have not. I never prayed for the house I could afford 15 years ago, but I found it. I never prayed that I could renovate the house to a manner that pleased me, but it was made possible. I never prayed for a new pickup, but God put what he wanted for me in my church parking lot. I have never bought a vehicle with such confidence! GOD my dear friends GOD!
God has been busy in my life when I didn’t measure up. He answered prayers I didn’t even pray. But with all humility I am asking for help now. Last year the air conditioning which was THIRTY years old broke down. I found a program through the city for disabled people that replaced the whole system at no charge. This past week I awoke to water leaking from the old water heater and got up made coffee and turned the water off to the house and started to think. I went online to Home Depot and purchased a gas water heater and would go into the store to set up install. In the store I scheduled the install, which they said would be $803.00. Well, the next day when they called they informed me that the city had strict codes to follow and now the install price went up to over $1700.00. My heart nearly failed. I have had just five grand left in the trust to last me as long as I live for things that I need. There is no affording a new roof—I have been trusting God that a hail storm will not destroy it. It doesn’t leak after the patch. I have not priced a roof lately so I am supposing it is north of $9000.00.
What I am saying is that I need to raise the $1700.00 for the install of the water heater and nearly ten thousand to replace the roof. I have never asked for charity and have worked for what I do have. But I am in worse condition than when I was awarded disability with more disorders and kidney disease. I really never expected to live to be 66 years old, but here I am.
You know how grateful I will be for any help you can offer. I love you.
David Land
sawznhamrs 